My Life as a Daily Skit Part 2

My husband has been invited to join me for my cardiology appointment. We have had the conversation about this being my appointment and he will need to allow me to ask the questions and interact with the doctor. It will be a struggle for him as he enjoys connecting with people often in a comedic way, but I like this cardiologist and I don't want to have to switch again. We both have concerns pertaining to my health so I understand that it is important to him to accompany me and I do believe that he understands that I need to remain the focus of the doctor so we embark on the appointment each of us a bit nervous in our own way.

From the start I can tell he is struggling. Literally wiggling in his seat as if he is a child playing the quiet game and wanting to burst because they have something to say. But only once did he jump over my answer to make a statement for me and a quick look reeled him back in. Only once did I have to remind him that I deserve 15 minutes to focus on my health and we could check out his insect bite when we get home. Only twice did I have to remind him that I needed to get back to work after the appointment and could not take him out to breakfast. It was a good trip and I told him so before we even got into the elevator. Thankfully we were able to laugh together about the few reminders because he knows I am not trying to be controlling and I know that even before you factor in Bi Polar Disorder, this is a man with a LOT of personality. His personality dictates his need to be the center of attention, not his illness. His personality dictates his lack of awareness of what is going on around him, not his illness. His personality also dictates his huge heart and desire to help, his love for his family and need for interaction. His gender creates his need for respect and his being a person creates his need to be loved. He is fire and ice before any diagnosis.

I feel like it is important to know this and to recognize what it is about your own spouse that is the base personality. I see so many posts in our support groups where Bi Polar is blamed for what is just plain bad behavior. Hypersexuality does not mean that a person with bi polar does not know they are cheating on their spouse when they have an affair and by the way, it does not excuse it. Bi Polar Disorder is not an excuse for physical abuse. Wrong is wrong and in sickness and in health, does not bind you to what is detrimental and dangerous. Abuse, abandonment and adulatory are acceptable reasons to re evaluate your situation even as the most devout Christian. By the same token, illness is not.